Blogosphere Essay

My intent of the design of my blog was to offer a piece of my life for others to see. It was supposed to convey my personality, the important people in my life, and some of the things that I like to do. In my blog I chose to write about my feelings and thoughts, from my dislike of snow to the fact that I go through phases with foods and have “who knows more” competitions with my little sister. My blog’s concept was to let people into my life and get a sense of who I am. I tried to offer personal photos to each blog post to make it more visually appealing.

My favorite blog post was from January 28th. It was untitled, much like the majority of my other blog posts. This individual post expressed my love/hate relationship with snow. While snow is pretty, after it has been around for a week, I’m just ready for it to melt and for the air to be warm again. Ever since moving to Muncie, I’ve learned to appreciate the warmth of my fireplace at home. With the text, I posted a picture of ice covered branches that I took during the previous winter at home.

I think that it takes a lot of time and effort to maintain a blog. Plus, it begins to feel a little pointless to keep posting when you get very little feedback. I think that the main purpose of a blog is to express yourself and have your voice be heard, but unless you have the patience and devotion to put your blog out there, eventually, it will sink. I’ve had a few blogs in the past, and much like I said in my very first blog post, I never kept up with them. I became too tired to write or I just flat out forgot. I also find it difficult to find topics to talk about because I hesitate to put anything too personal in each post. More power to the people that are able to maintain successful blogs. I envy those.

Does this look like a mean face?

I've come to the conclusion that I'm unapproachable.

Yesterday my roommate told me about a girl that lives on our floor that said that she tried to say hi to me one day, but I completely wrote her off..

This was surprising to me. I mean, if she tried to say hi to me yesterday then, yes, maybe I did. That's only because yesterday was an awful day.

The thing is, I'm not rude or mean. Plus, I don't even remember this person ever making an effort at saying hello.

And today, when I got out of the shower she was about to get in the one shower stall next to the one I got out of and she looked over at me and moved three showers down. I was going to say hi to her when I walked out, but she didn't even look at me.

I think part of it is because when my face doesnt have an emotion or I'm not smiling, I look pissed. Now that is beyond my control.

Having dark eyes and a mouth that doesn't naturally curve upwards doesn't mean I'm a frigid bitch. Actually, I'm a pretty nice person. I like to talk to people and make them laugh.

I'll tell you a dirty joke, a secret, a funny story, a knock knock joke (ILOVETHOSE)

A Walk to Remember was on last night. Gets me everytime. If I don't cry, I get the chills. There are only a few movies that I can watch over and over again and never tire of:
-Almost Famous
-Titanic
-Never Been Kissed (I watched this everyday for an entire summer one year)
-Mean Girls
-Love Actually

There are movies that I know almost every line to.. Titanic being one of them.. Princess Diaries being another one..

The Notebook is a good movie too, but I can't just watch it anytime I want to, I have to be in the right mood. That's usually after Ben and I have gotten into an argument or if I'm in need of a good cry. :P

Disney movies are good for just about anything. Lion King is my all time favorite. When I was younger and I couldn't get to sleep, I would go downstairs and fall asleep watching it. I'd like to watch Beauty and the Beast in the near future...I haven't seen that one in years. Ben and I watched Tarzan two weekends ago. I think it would be really cool if I could fly through trees and stuff like that the way that he did. He was ripped.




I think it's abosulutely rediculous that we don't get tomorrow off. We get Christmas, why not Easter? I would really like to go home, but I can't because I have a test tomorrow. :[

I just finished my course request for next semester...
I decided to endure 18 credit hours with these classes:

Fcsfa (fashion/design class) 270
CC 205 (Mythologies of the World)
Chemistry 100
Maths 125
Journalism 103
Journalism 105

I'm really excited about the Mythologies class for the mere fact that now, when my little sister and I go head to head in a who knows more competition, I can hold my own. Seriously, this 12 year old girl knows more about Greek mythology than I do. I always have to resort to... "what's this times this? WROOOOONG!" Well, not anymore. I can't wait to whoop her at it. And boy, do I plan on it..

I have a feeling, though, that she will still hold it over my head that she got into Gifted and Talented in elementary school and I didn't. Little shit. Love her.

Not being able to get to sleep at night, feeling hungry but not wanting any food, and being stuck with no way out are some of the worst feelings in the world. And this week, I was stuck with no way out.

I know it was only our first week back from Spring Break, but I just really wanted to make it home for the weekend. I tried asking the one person I know from home who has a car here to see if there was any chance at all she was headed south. No, she wasn't. I tried to convince my dad to come and get me. "Dad, there's a wedding to go to." (there really is, it's today, I swear) "I just, I miss you." (like that was ever going to work) "I have to get a summer job, and I can't do that if I can't go around town picking up applications. . ."

And still the answer was no.

I even sunk so low as to ask an acquaintence. A person I met once, who USED to be good friends with one of my best friends, and who is currently dating one of my boyfriend's exes. Desperate? I'd say so. "No, I don't have a car here. Sorry."

It wasn't even the fact that I would be spending the weekend here instead of at home that upset me, it was that I was absolutely powerless. I had no say in the matter. No matter what I did, said, or how I felt, I couldn't change it. I was stuck.

I guess I'm going to have to find a job that will give me the funds to buy my own car...

Claiming the spot as Amazon's Best Book of the Decade...So Far and becoming the number one New York Times Best Seller, the Twilight saga has blown into a huge phenomenon capturing the attention of teen girls nationwide.

The first book of the series, Twilight, introduces it's readers to Bella Swan, a clumsy girl who has just moved from hot Arizona to rainy Forks, Washington where she struggles with making friends at her new high school as well as adjusting to life under her father's roof. To top it all off, a boy comes into her life who turns her world upside down, launching her into a life full of mythical creatures and near death experiences. Edward Cullen captivates Bella with his breathtaking presence and his smooth words. With lines like, "If I could dream, it would be about you, and I'm not ashamed of it," and "Take my heart, I've left it with you," it's no wonder these books melted hearts across the world.

But when reading these books, I can't help but wonder, what ever happened to a vampire being a dark, mysterious being with no soul who can't step into the sunlight without catching fire? If you ask me, Edward Cullen, the boy who sparkles on a sunny day, is more of a pansy than a life threatening, blood sucking vamp. While he does have superhuman strength and the ability to run faster than a car can drive, his controlling attitude and constant fear make him come off as more of a sissy than anything.

When compared to another popular drama about vampires, the TV series Buffy the Vampire Slayer tops Twilight hands down. Spike, the sarcastic jerk that you hate to love sums up the ideal vampire in one character. The scary quality shows through when he transforms into an ugly, fang bearing monster on the hunt. He tugs at your heartstrings when he fights his feelings for the biggest threat in his life, the vampire slayer.

Twilight is a lustful teen romance novel that leaves it's readers going, "awww," but not much else.

I hate confrontation. Really hate it. Most of the time I will bite my tongue and swallow my words just to avoid it. But it pops up in my life no matter how hard I try to run from it.



What sucks even worse than the fact that there is drama is that, after all the biting of the tongue and swallowing of the words, when I'm in the heat of the moment, I forget all the things that I have wanted to say all along, so I end up losing. Then I want to slap myself in the face, because all my issues could have been resolved if only I would've remembered at the second.



Then, later, after it's all said and done, I come up with other things I could've said to give myself a stronger argument that I would love to bring back up, but the moment has been killed. So, if I do bring it back up then I'm just recreating drama and dragging everything out. And we're back to the whole running from confrontation.



So, everything I wanted and should've said just keeps running through my mind, and I stay pissed.



PLUS, the fact that I don't bring up issues until someone brings them up first always makes me end up being the bad guy. I reallllllly hate that.



There are so many things that I want to say to some people, it's driving me crazy.

Instead, I keep buying the Bowl Appetite Alfredo noodles my roommate thinks stinks up the room as a way to passively be aggressive. But that's even bitchier than calling her out on the things that annoy me...

I keep going through these phases where I crave different foods...
Last semester I craved apple sauce and pudding.
Now I'm into Caramel Apple Pops and Root Beer.
I remember a time where it was all about peanut butter,
and then it was popcorn with chocolate chips dumped in the
bowl right after it came out of the microwave so they melted.
I went through a BIG chicken and cheese quesadilla phase.
Every night I came home from work, I made one for dinner.

I think it's weird.

The other night I asked my roommate if I was insane. Her response was: "You're sane. You're weird."

I'm living in StuWest next fall..in Painter Hall. ...rhyme...

Last weekend was the weekend of babies.

I finally met Kalia. Have babies always been so tiny?

I got so used to tossing Hadley around that I forgot just how itty bitty brand new babies are.

This is calf number 2. I'm trying to convince my boyfriend to name her Ginger.

She kept eating my pant leg.

I want to take her home with me.

My junior and senior year of high school I became very interested in photography. So much so that I was considering going to school for a photography-related major. I applied to three different schools and had a specific major planned for whichever one I went to. If I chose Columbia (an art school in downtown Chicago), I would major in photography, Western Kentucky it would be photojournalism, or here where I am currently majoring in Magazine Journalism. It took me a long time to find something that I was good at, that held my attention, and inspired creativity.

Ever since I came here, I have barely even touched my camera.

And I miss it.

this has been going around facebook...

...i figure i should spread the love to blogger as well...

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. My first purchase from Gadzooks was an alien hologram (sp?) t shirt.
2. I trust easy and believe in second chances. There's not one thing about me that someone doesn't know.
3. College isn't as awesome as I thought it would be. I guess I don't make friends as easily as I used to.
4. I love that I know what love feels like. I hate that I know what its like to miss someone so badly, though; 115 miles feels like forever.
5. I like to spend money, just not my own, and I rarely buy things full price. Im cheap as fuck.
6. Shopping in Tokyo would be badass.
7. I finally decided, purple is my favorite color. However, I still dont have a favorite number or animal.
8. When people ask me what I want to do, I usually respond with, "I aspire to be like Lauren Conrad when she worked at Teen Vogue" you may laugh now.
9. My grandpa is the most incredible person ever.
10. Im not afraid of growing old and getting wrinkles.
11. I drive a green car. That's about all I know about it.
12. If I were Kate of Jon and Kate plus 8, I think I would run away.
13. I haven't cried in two days!
14. Im laid back about things that any normal person would flip out about.
15. I used to be able to hula hoop. I no longer can, and it bugs the hell out of me.
16. My very best friend lives hours away. We don't talk too often, but when we do, it's just like she still lives across the street.
17. Dishes and dusting are my least favorite chores.
18. I have sausage fingers.
19. The warmest feeling is falling asleep next to somebody. The coldest feeling is sleeping alone.
20. House of Wax with Paris Hilton scared me.
21. Im the one that says the dirty things everyone else is thinking.
22. I resent the fact that I have to wear shoes in the shower here.
23. Falling down makes me feel imcompetent and retarded.
24. I get the giggles during serious moments. Such as during a moment of silence or prayer. It's awful.
25. I think red bed sheets are sexy.

...i did it twice, because i'm lame. So here's another list of fun facts...

1. I can say every line to Titanic as well as Almost Famous and many episodes of The OC
2. Sometimes a good cry is necessary
3. I have a freakishly close relationship with my mother.
4. I'm an aunt to the two cutest little girls ever. I have a feeling they're going to be polar opposites when they grow up, though.
5. I got my height, shade of red hair and ability to write with my left hand from my dad, but everything else came from my mother.
6. 2008 was one of the best years of my life and I hope it continues on through this year.
7. Tacos, cheeseburgers, and pizza are just a few of the foods I loooooooooooove.
8. Corey Lake is by far my favorite place on Earth.
9. I see nothing wrong with staying home on the weekends.
10. I prefer crunchy peanut butter to creamy, pens to pencils, dim light to bright light, and barefeet to socks.
11. Twiight was held to a much higher standard than it deserved.
12. 1 year ago I hated country music. Now, it's all I listen to.
13. I think farts are funny.
14. Ben is cute.
15. No matter how many times people try to explain it to me, I fail to understand the rules of football.
16. I don't need a whole bunch of friends, just as long as I have a few really good ones.
17. My gut feeling is usually right.
18. I hate riding the MITS bus. It smells funky and it makes me feel dirty.
19. It took me three tries to get my license.
20. I'm nosy. But I'm a polite nosy.
21. Jackets can either make or break an outfit. And denim on denim is rarely a good idea.
22. I hate Sundays and Mondays
23. My word origins professor is really annoying.
24. I thoroughly enjoy acting like a kid every now and then...by going to the zoo, playing with sidewalk chalk, having water balloon fights, watching disney movies, etc.
25. I hate confrontation.



consider yourself tagged.
..and... GO!

I love winter, I really do. I thoroughly enjoy snow. Making footprints in a fresh blanket of the stuff, snow angels, a failed attempt to make a snowman (I have never succeeded in creating a decent snowman), the cancellation of school, and curling up in front of a fire. But the downsides of winter kind of trump the beauty of it for me. Unless there's snow, winter is ugly. Grey skies, empty tree branches, very litte color. It's almost depressing. Not to mention the fact that you get fat in the winter.

And when there is snow, it makes driving treacherous, when you walk outside it hurts to breathe, your nose gets all red and drippy, and I especially hate it when it takes so much effort to walk from one place to another that you start to sweat even though your teeth are chattering.

When snow somehow makes its way into your gloves or down your pants and your wrists and butt turn numb. I hate that too. When you have to get out and push the car up a hill with your mom sitting in the drivers seat pounding on the gas, spitting dirty snow at you, that sucks as well.

My favorite time of the year is when everything comes back to life. In the spring, where you go away for a few days, leaving naked trees behind, and returning to everything regenerating. The green comes back, and the skies start to look a little bluer. The temperature plays with 60 degrees and you can finally pull out the flip flops you wish you could've been wearing for the past five months. You can start to toy with idea of summer and tank tops, shorts, days of swimming and laying out. Cookouts, county fairs, and drive-ins.

My second neice was born today right around 3:50 p.m. She was 8.2 pounds and 21 inches long. Kalia Layne (Kalia means 'beauty' in Hawaiin) is her name, and I can't wait to meet her.

When I was a little girl, every time I got a new diary, the first entry would be pretty much my life story... Since my life at the time was only about 9 years long, it wasn't very a lengthy story. Not to mention the fact that I was easily distracted by cartoons on TV or a spoonful of peanut butter. But now that I am nearly nineteen years old, I can safely say that my life story has doubled in length, and while it's probably only interesting to me, I think I should remain true to my inner nine year old and begin this diary-like weblog with a little bit about myself...




I am the third child of four. First born is my sister, Cassandra (the one who you think is showing her boob. She's not, I swear, it's just a flesh colored bra..). Then came my brother Nathan (third from the right, not wearing a shirt). Three years after Nathan, I came along. I was a 'foundling,' or so they said. I grewup not looking like anyone in my family. How I ended up with red hair, no one will ever know... But I'm definitely a product of my parents. I am pretty much my mother when it comes to personality, and my dad gave me gift of being left-handed (Btw, the left handed notebooks in the CBX bookstore make me so mad. What's the point? It's only going to confuse us. We've spent our whole lives with the pen marks lining the side of our hand, and living in a right hand world, that a left hand notebook would probably be more of an inconvenience than the stupid ring on the right handers notebook). Six years later my little sister, Harper, joined the picture (she's the one photoshopped into the background).


I have a niece named Hadley...



...and another one named Kalia on the way. She should be here by Wednesday.

At home, we have our own little farm of four horses (Bailey, Beau, Nickel, and Zeke), 3 dogs (Snickers, Mocha, and Bones), and 2 cats (Xena and Andy).

I love photography, John Mayer, traveling, the library, red shoes, hats (although I don't wear them often). mismatching, really really bad jokes, and Mexican food.

Now, I need a shower.